Sunday, October 9, 2011

Who runs the family?


The husband earns the money and the wife takes care of the family. Or not?

The relation between a man and a woman has in many countries more and more equalized over the past centuries. Sometimes it is even the opposite nowadays then what we were used to and it is the wife who is in charge. In NL we call it that 'the lady is wearing the pants'. I learned from a colleague of mine, who has been borne and raised in the Ukraine, what a marriage looks like over there. That's quite different than we are used to, as far as I can say. I learned just from one single point of view, but still, it amazed me that much that I'd like to share it with you.

In the old days it was quite common over here that husband and wife had their own tasks - the wife took care of the family: she cook, she raised the children, she cleaned the house, washed the clothes, etc. The husband was responsible for the income and that there was enough food for everybody. As mentioned before roles & responsibilities in a Dutch household (and ind different western countries as well) have become more similar. These days it's quite normal that both husband and wife earn money and share household activities. We even know 'daddy's day' which can be explained in a sense that fathers work 4 days in the week and the fifth day he takes care of the children. He may work from home a little bit, but in general he is looking after the kids.

In the Ukraine it's different. Women in over there are still responsible for the complete household. And I mean everything that needs to happen in and around the house to keep the family alive and to make sure that the house remains standing. Okay, perhaps the pregnant lady doesn't have to climb on a ladder, but that's just my western assumption. She is not only taking care of the household. It's very much likely that the same wife works for the family money as well! And not because of the fact that something happened to the husband or that it is a temporary situation. No, they are used to it. both men and women. Since their youth, men have been spoiled by their mother and their wives are continuing this. Men are lazy creatures, she called them (with the exception of her own husband of course)

Now I get why ladies over there are so interesting. And it is not only because they are beautiful...